It’s true.  I never wanted to own my own business.  I grew up seeing the back end of business and it didn’t look fun.  To me, a business owner is someone who works their butt off for years to make ends meet, and in the end, may or may not get an awesome payoff.  A business owner always has to be on point, can never coast through life, and 5 O’clock means absolutely nothing.

And now that I own a business, let me tell you…

I was right.

It is crazy hard.  It’s right up there with being a parent.  I spend hours doing things I don’t want to do and going outside of my comfort zone.  Often I wonder why I put myself through so much purely for love.  I love my kid, so I deal with diaper changes, car seats, meltdowns, etc.  I love photography so I deal with taxes, mileage and contracts.  But?  I love my child.  And I love my clients, photographing/filming their memories, and making something beautiful.  It’s so worth it!

It’s interesting what we do to ourselves.  Many times I’ve wondered why I don’t just spiff up my resume and get a 9-5 job.  I’ve had other jobs before that I loved!  It is quite expensive to run a business, even when you’re a penny pincher.  There are places that we can cut corners (like which file folders we buy and shopping at Goodwill for decorations), and then there are places where we can’t skimp (like equipment and a fast internet connection).  Even 3.5 years in, almost all profits go toward buying new equipment & business expenses.

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But just when I start to feel bogged down by the business aspect of everything, I talk to a bride who is absolutely giddy about her wedding day.  I get to photograph every beautiful detail that she’s planned for one of the most important days of her life.  That is unreal!  I mean, how awesome of a job is that?  People pay me to take pictures!  They get all dressed up and get their hair and makeup done and then they trust me to capture that memory forever.

So today as I sit in my office adding up mileage and organizing receipts, I smile.  Life is definitely not what I thought it would be.  It’s much better. And now I see why all those crazy business owners do what they do.  They love it.

And so do I.